"What are you doing?"
"Blogging."
"Oh..."
Still, I miss blogging from the Myspace days. In this age of FB that almost seems like a dirty word as well. Myspace. In any case, I miss it. So that's why I decided to start one up.
"What's it gonna be about, Jason?"
I wish I knew. I guess whatever is on my mind, whatever is going on in my life. If you know me in RL maybe it will be about what's going on in yours. It will most likely be offensive, so let me apologize in advance. It's just how I am.
1......2......3......go
Some of you may know that I have been going to the gym lately. Some of you may also know that I have also shelled out some cash to work with a personal trainer. This is something that has always been unthinkable to me....more than unthinkable. Retarded. In the past my train of thought traveled along these lines:
So, let me get this straight. I pay money for you to tell me things I can learn from the internet? I learn how to lose weight from someone who has probably never had to lose any significant amount of weight in their life? Yes, I know, you work really hard every spring to lose 10 punk ass pounds so you can look good at the lake in the summer.
After many years of being morbidly obese and succeeding in only getting heavier I am ready to try anything. You'll know if you ever get there. You may think of the movie Se7en and remember that part where the lawyer is found dead with his love handle cut off. One pound of flesh, no more no less. No cartilage, no bone, but only flesh. You think of that scene, you look at the butter knife on the table while your at Olive Garden stuffing your hole full of <insert choice of pasta here>, and you think for a moment that that might not be so bad. Well, maybe you won't. You may consider other extreme alternatives. Maybe bariatric surgery. I did. More on that in a later blog.
So. Here I am. Retarded. I'm OK with it. If you feel like I felt there are probably a great many things you don't know. Like how when you check out the internet for that knowledge there is so much info it's enough to make you head explode. Worse, a lot of it is just bullshit. You'd be surprised how many legit looking sites are really only there to sell you something. Actually, you shouldn't be surprised. Greedy fucks are everywhere, the internet is no exception. I don't know why I was surprised at all. The thing is, even if you are able to filter out all the bullshit, you're left with so much information it's almost impossible to find the information you need. The info that pertains to you and your body. After a great many hours I caved and got a trainer.
Pros: I am finding more and more that I don't like to let people down. Don't mistake that for I won't let you down. I most certainly will. I just don't want to. I'm an asshole, not a deliberate asshole. The distinction may not mean much to you, but it means the world to me. So, I don't like to let people down. I don't like to quit when someone is watching. When someone is monitoring. When someone is investing their time into me, even if I am paying them for it. I don't like to be a disappointment to others. I don't like being one to myself either, but somewhere down the line have accepted it. The trainer keeps me honest. If I don't progress I have someone to answer to, someone who notices. I have a single source of pre-filtered information. The trainer introduces variation.
Cons: It's expensive. Straight up. Expensive.
Even that's not such a con. It's an investment. It's motivation to work my ass off so I'm not wasting my money.
More on all of that later. If that bored you than you may not want to follow this blog. This thing, this health thing is a big part of my life right now. Someone once told me it's called catching fire. It was in a religious context. It was used to describe when people first find their faith and start gong to church for the first time regularly. People often catch fire and burn bright with fervor and a yearning for knowledge about God. The problem was that fires burn out. I'm sure I've caught fire, I just need to keep it going. Stay lit. In any case, while I am, I will probably blog about it a lot. There's your warning.
In other news (I will keep it short because I have to get up early and I still want to watch Game of Thrones before bed):
Been playing Rift. For those that don't know, it's an MMORPG. If you don't know what that is, call me geek now and get it done with. It's awesome. I loved WoW, but this is a great change of pace. It doesn't reinvent the genre, but it polishes the shit out of it. If you're into that sort of thing, check it out.
Work has been slightly crazy lately, I feel like I have a lot to prove. That's nothing new, I have always felt like I had something to prove since I started, but now I feel the stakes are higher. I imagine that is the exact opposite most people feel when they are finally made permanent. I like it though. I am pushing myself to learn more, and for the first time I feel like I have a career to map out. I sort of think I want to run shit. Maybe not at my current job, but somewhere.
I miss him. Fucker was supposed to miss me, not the other way around. That's all I will say about that right now
Alright, I'm out. Time to go watch Game of Thrones. You should too. It's badass.
I'll post on FB when more blogs come out. If you really care I think there is a follow by email gadget on here as well.
Jason B
why did he call it "Sweet & Sour"?
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