A day late and a dollar lost

Been gone a long, long time.  Time for some catch up I guess......or would you rather some ketchup?  Or Catsup if you're an asshole.


I am separated from my wife.  I say wife and not wife or wife because it best expresses how I feel about using that term....or maybe it just expresses best how I feel about the relationship I have with her now.  Thin, almost frail....slanted.  Italicized.  Like the very act of trying to salvage or save it may crush it.  Like when someone tries to save an other's life via CPR and accidentally causes fractured ribs and internal bleeding.  Then your ass gets sued.  Cause you're not qualified to save their life, just fucking it up when they are down.  Bee-tee-dub, don't go thinking you can get away with that.

I won't go into the nitty-gritty of how the ship sank, just take my word that I aimed that motherfucker at an iceberg and lost the biggest game of chicken of my life.  Ya know, because it's an iceberg.  A force of nature that doesn't fear you at all and demands your respect and humility.  I and the Titanic are it's eternal bitches.  To speak plainly, I really am what was wrong with our relationship....our marriage.

It takes two to fail in a marriage, Jason....


What can I say, I'm just that good.  Err, or bad?  The details aren't important.  Just trust me on this.

Since the separation started, December 3rd 2011, 9:30/10ish in the morning, I have discovered a few things.

1. It's very easy to criticize someone when they are doing something you never do.  Trust me.  Your options are to either jump in and help, offer to do it so they don't have to, or let them do it their way.  But Jason, what about popping off at the mouth with some critical comment that can only be taken as confrontational as well as slightly condescending?  No.  That is not an option.  That is being an asshole.  
2. You may feel stupid or foolish complimenting your SO all the time, but get over it.  I grew up in a family where compliments were a rarity.  When they did come out they were often sarcastic.  Good grades or being a good kid were not things you were complimented on....you were supposed to be good.  You didn't complimented on things you were supposed to be.  However, not being good got you your ass handed to you.  I was taught at work you didn't need to be appreciated, you got a pay check and continued to get a paycheck if they appreciated you....if you weren't appreciated, you were fired.  WTF is  your point?   My point is that whether you think it's stupid or not, if you don't tell the person you're with how much they mean to you, what you love about them, then they will never know.  If you used to, but don't anymore, they will forget.  It's not hard to take 2 seconds out of your fucking day to appreciate someone.  It's a shit ton better than the alternative.
3. Sacrifices must be made.  If you aren't making any, than your partner is making double the sacrifices they should.
4. Fuck constantly.  Or have sex.  Or make love.  Or whatever you crazy kids like to do.  

Kk, enough of that.  I sure as shit don't know enough about marriage or relationships to be preaching, so....yeah.  I know this is a short blog.  Short for me anyways.  I'll post another soon....one not so separation-centric.  

Jason B
why didn't he know that before?